To hold someone is to say: You don’t have to carry this alone. To hold yourself in the process is to say: Neither do I.

A practical guide to nervous system regulation and rupture-repair dynamics.

For years, we’ve dismissed emotional intelligence, communication, and care as “soft skills,” or the optional extras of the professional world. Kind, but not critical. Nice, but not necessary.

That language is long overdue for a rewrite.

We rarely talk about this kind of slow self-abandonment. The ways we ghost not only others but also the part of ourselves that once trusted community as a source of care. So why do we disappear, and how can we begin to come back?

The myth of finding your people suggests that belonging is passive— something that happens when the right conditions align. Yet both psychology and lived experience tell us otherwise: belonging isn't found, it's built.